Facial Fur

What is it about facial hair that everyone hates? In past ages the greatest warriors wore them, the greatest minds could almost hide behind theirs. Why then this irrational hate of beards and other facial fungi?

Perhaps that is part of the problem, 'facial fungi'. How can something that is referred to as a growth commonly associated with rotting material, poison and disease be seen as good? The growth of facial hair is a physical demonstration of the maturing of a child's body into adulthood, yet as soon as this downy fur starts appearing they are ridiculed for it and forced to hack it off. With the severe lack of experience that these children have they are forced to cut it away with razor blades, which are extremely dangerous, with an unsteady hand and no knowledge of how to shave. When they eventually emerge, with the inevitable scratches bleeding down thier chin and neck, they are again mocked, this time for their inability to shave.

There is also a significant lack of people in high places wearing such fur to keep their face warm. Politicians do not wear them, celebrity actors just forget to shave regularly, and who listens to scientists these days? Public perception of the beard has changed, rather than making old men look distinguished or revered it now makes them look like perverts and paedophiles. It makes men in middle age look worn and destitute rather than rugged and world wise, and the young look like Jesus or bums rather than the warriors and men that once the beard would have signified.

In the military there is need for conformity in the ranks to aid in discipline and unit cohesion, in the airforce for pilots as an essential safety measure, and in the navy it is something flammable near your chin in case of fire on the ship.

In general though a beard should not be viewed with such disapproval. A beard is not the sign of an untidy mind.